There's this girl I know and I read her blog. And sometimes, I get really jealous of her. There are times when I feel like she has everything that I have always wanted: a good husband, a spot in the MFA program I want to do if I ever get enough money, a baby on the way. I hate that I get so jealous, because she's really great and I think she's an amazing and admirable person.
And then, in my height of jealousy, she'll post something on her blog (as she did today) that helps me realize that her life isn't perfect and she goes through hard times too. It's not that I rejoice in her misfortunes, because it hurts me to hear that something bad is happening in her life, but it makes my heart lighter to know that she isn't perfect, just like me.
I think that this is something that we all go through. We check our facebook or read someone's blog, and it seems like everything is going great for everyone else. This person gets a great job, this person is on an amazing vacation, this guy just got engaged, this girl is having a baby. All we ever see are the amazing things in people's lives, and then we look at our own and wonder what's wrong with us. "Why am I stuck in a dead end job?" We might ask ourselves. "I've never been anywhere cool. I haven't been on a date in three years. I'm still living with my parents."
I know this observation isn't anything new. There's been news articles about once every three months about how there is a rise in depression because of facebook. But I guess what I'm thinking is, sometimes it's okay to let people know that something didn't go right. You don't have to post only bad things--that's going to the extreme in the other direction--but just to let people know that you run into parked cars too sometimes. Or the thought of going to your high school reunion makes you scared because you're certain you will be the only single person left in your class. You don't always need to plaster a smile on your face.
That's something that I try to do with this blog. I try to be positive when I tell stories about my struggles, but I feel like it's important to let people know that I make mistakes. I make mistakes a lot. I'm a mistake maker. But I also sometimes do awesome things and I want to share that too! So, maybe, the 39 people who read this blog will come to it and realize that they aren't alone when their car breaks down, or a customer at work yelled at them, or they just had the kind of day that only ice cream and a tear-jerker movie can fix.
I've always said that if I could make a difference in one life, I would feel that my life was complete. I hope that maybe this little personal blog, sometime, for someone, somewhere, can make a difference somehow.
Here's a new song I discovered. Remember, we all have something to share.