Mar 5, 2013

Being "My Age"

Next month I have a big birthday coming up. Quarter of a century. The big XXV. Yup, the last birthday where I pass through one more rite of adulthood (being able to rent a car): 25.

I have a thing about growing up. It's completely unavoidable. It's nature--you have to grow up. But I don't think that this means that just because we reach a certain age, say, 21, 25, 40, 65, means that we have to all of a sudden be all serious and only interested in "adult" things. I love Disney movies, and Disney pop. I like Doctor Who. I read teen fiction. I still have my childhood teddy bear. I like graphic tees. I love pointless movies and TV shows (you know, the ones that require no thought whatsoever, and you just laugh and laugh). There are definitely some times when you need to be a grown up and be serious. And I still like classic novels, and more serious movies. But I don't think we should stop having fun just because we are a certain age. But I don't like to be treated as if I'm a kid either.

The thing is, I still look like I'm 18. Everyone keeps telling me I'll appreciate my youthful face when I'm older--and I'm sure I will--but right now, it's a little it annoying. I've been thinking about it, and I really think that me looking 7 years younger than I am causes people to treat me as if I really were 18. I feel like I'm talked down too. Sometimes I feel like people are being condescending. And that kind of bothers me. I'm not some kid just going out into the world. I have a college degree, a job, an apartment, a car, a cell phone, insurance (all of which I paid/pay for myself), as well as bills to pay, food to buy, a budget to manage, etc. So, I definitely know about being a grown up.

Since I refuse to give up my teen fiction and Disney films, I have decided that maybe I should try to start looking my age more. This week, I decided that I am going to wear makeup everyday. Ugh. I like makeup, really, and I like experimenting and trying out new things, but at 7 o'clock in the morning, the last thing I want to be doing is trying to put my eyeliner on straight. But I'm doing it! Before I would just put on some concealer and blush and go out the door. So, that's one way I'm trying to look more my age. I've also curled my hair everyday today (as opposed to just blow drying it), and tomorrow I will be getting a haircut that I hope will help me look older (though I have this fear that it will make me look younger . . .).

I guess the thing is, I want to be treated like I'm a grown up, but I don't think I should have to give up things I like to be a grown up. Which is why I'm trying to look more my age, rather than 18 years old.

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