Differing Ideas

I'm not someone who can express herself in a intelligent and thoughtful manner in the middle of a discussion. I really wish I was. There have been several times in my life where if I had just been able to process what was being said to me and form a good answer, things would have gone over better, either for me or the other person. But when caught in the middle of an unexpected conversation, it's as if my brain is whirling over whatever it is the other person brought up and anything I can say seems trite, simple, or unintelligent. Which then, of course, means that I spend hours or days thinking of all the things I wish I had said.

This last week I found myself in the middle of one of these kinds of conversations. It was tricky, because I started feeling like a part of my life--a choice I had made a long time ago--was being attacked, and by someone I considered a friend. And I couldn't seem to make this person see that. Then I started feeling as if this person was treating my ideas as if it was just because I was too young (I'm several years younger then my friend) and there's something really diminishing about being treated like a child just because your ideas differ from someone else's. I think it maybe my friend was trying to pass it off as a joke, but it was something so close to my heart that it was hard to take it that way.

I think what I'm trying to get at is . . . we all have different ideas. We may not always agree with each other--in fact, we may disagree with other people's ideas more than we agree with them. But that doesn't mean that we have to make them feel small, or attack them because of their ideas. There is a difference between having a conversation about ideas, and have a debate where you are trying to "win." Basically, and I'm sure I've said this before, let's just be nice and considerate of others. We're all entitled to our own ideas; you don't have to agree with them, but you don't have to be cruel--even if you think you're joking. Life is already so hard without tearing others down and causing discontent. I understand that you shouldn't just stop saying things because someone may be offended by it, but don't tear others down for doing the same thing.

Motivational Type

I decided to make a wall in my bedroom with some motivational quotes, to remind me that things are always good, or going to get better. I played around a bit in InDesign and came up with a few. I mean to add a few more in the coming weeks.

Basically, "count your blessings." I need to be better at this.

Isn't Dr. Suess a genius?

One of my favorite Islamic sayings. I'm really hoping that the Arabic on the bottom says what the website indicated . . . 

This was my first attempt at a sort of "subway" art. It's tough because, unless there's some other way to do it, you have to have multiple text boxes.

April Book of the Month

Apparently this month has not been the best month for reading. As in, I've only read four books this month, which is really weird (for me). In that case (and because I'm not feeling well), I'm going to just tell you three of the four books that I read:

A Beginner's Guide to Acting English by Shappi Khorsandi. Memoir of Iran refugees in England.

Ketchup Clouds by Annabel Pitcher. YA Fiction about a girl writing to a murderer on death row.

This Star Won't Go Out by Esther Earl, et al. Nonfiction book being a collection of letters, journals, and memories of Esther Earl, a teenager who died from thyroid cancer.

All of these will be reviewed on my book review blog in the coming month.

Update: Birthday and Comic-Con

April has been an exciting month, lots to do and lots of fun. The month started with LDS General Conference, which I got to spend at home with Mom, Dad, and Bro. The next weekend was my birthday! My birthday happened to get stretched out to cover the whole weekend, and into the week a little bit.

The day before my official birthday I spent with friends. That morning I went to the temple to C, then in the afternoon M and I went to see a matinee of Les Miserables (a Christmas present from my parents--twice the enjoyment!). The play was AMAZING! I've seen it before, but I'm always struck by the story of redemption and how it only took one person to show val Jean that he was more than just a former prisoner. It just gets to me, so of course I cried.

After the show we got dinner at one of my favorite restaurants and took it to go (what we usually do). Then when we got home I opened the door to this:

As my brain was trying to make this fit into my reality, I was surprised by friends popping out from behind the kitchen counter! M and C had planned a surprise party for me and I was totally oblivious to the whole thing! It was a fun night, with just a few friends, which is exactly what I like.

Then on my birthday, I got to wear a new dress I had bought precisely for my birthday (because I felt I deserved it :) ).

I love the fifties style! After church I went to the parentals and had a little nap, then dinner, presents, and cheesecake! My birthday was extended even further on Tuesday when General Minion and Minion S took me out to lunch to Kneader's.

Then Thursday was Comic-Con! I was excited and nervous for my very first con. I went with my coworker and fellow whovian, K. Oh my gosh, it was so much fun! Just being around all these geeks, and feeling a connection to hundreds of people you don't know is awesome! Highlights: I made friends while waiting in line for a panel; I met Adam Baldwin and Nathan Fillion (oh, so handsome); and seeing all the creative costumes people come up with. Here a just a few pictures:

My day one cosplay! I got a lot of compliments, and a few people even asked if they could take my photo!

My new friends!

Ioan Gruffudd. He's so charming. 

James Marsters. I just couldn't get a really good picture of him. 

Day 2 cosplay--Nerdherder!

Karl Urban. He drove right past us! 

Getting Adam Baldwin's autograph. He was so nice!

Awesome Christoff and Elsa--I love her attitude.

The oh so ruggedly handsome Nathan Fillion. 

The cute and fun Karen Gillan.

Adam Baldwin during his panel.

Me and R2-D2! He even made squeely noises.

Definitely can't wait to go to another con! I was exhausted every night, but it was so much fun!

That's about it for now--hopefully I'll have some news on the job front in the near-ish future!

Sunday Special: Faith Needs Action

There has been something on my mind a lot lately and that's that faith takes action. It came up in Sunday School, I think when we were talking about Isaac and Rebekah, in Genesis 24. When the servant was sent to find Isaac a wife, the Lord told the servant who to choose. When Rebekah is asked if she will go back to Canaan to marry a man she has never met: "And they called Rebekah, and said unto her, Wilt thou go with this man? And she said, I will go" (v. 58). That took so much faith for her, but it's the action that shows how much faith she actually has.

Even though I knew about the faith=action thing before, for the time of life that I'm in at the moment it really struck me hard. So in my own personal scripture study I started noticing all the times that someone acted on their faith and what that means. 

I was IMing with my Mom about applying for jobs and why I had been so hesitant to do so. I didn't want to be rejected anymore, but really I needed to get over that and just start applying, because if I didn't I never would get a job. I can say all I want "God has a plan for me" but with out me actively searching, that plan will never come to pass. And that's what I was reading in my scripture study, that the people I was reading about were acting instead of just waiting for the Lord to provide, but they were keeping the Lord in on their plans. 

It's hard. I like having roots and just staying where I am, but that isn't possible. Some times it's better to move on, some times it is forced on you, but if you keep your faith and move forward, things will work out. Even if you are unsure how. 

Just one last thought. My mom told me this a couple of years ago and it's another thing that I have had to remember the past year: Once you make a decision, you never look back. In another part in Genesis, Lot and his wife are told to leave Sodom, and not to look back. "And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape for they life; look not behind them . . . lest thou be consumed . . . But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt" (Genesis 19: 17, 26). This was a very physical consuming, but I think that it's a good metaphor for this decision making. If you keep thinking "what if" and "if I had" then you will be consumed by something you can't change. So focus on the "now" and the future. 

Sorry if that seemed kind of all over the place, but my thoughts have been making a circuitous route in my brain for a while. Mostly, act on your faith and don't look back. 

March Book of the Month

I realized on my way home that I haven't posted my recommended book that I read during the month of March! How dare I post it one day late?! I've been busy applying for jobs and getting ready for comic con (yes! My first con! So excited.) that it completely slipped my mind.

Anyway, here's my suggestion for the month: Code Name Verity by Elizabeth Wein. For a full review of this book, you can go to my new book review blog here. Here's what I'm going to say about it. It's beautiful, it's heart wrenching, it's unique, it's thought provoking, it's spunky, and it's amazing. Wein introduces characters and a setting that I never even thought about existing, creating a wonderful piece of WWII fiction that, for me, is right up there with Markus Zusack's The Book Thief. I felt attached to Verity almost immediately, and the twists and turns in her story were perfectly paced and completely intriguing.

Pesto Pizza

One good thing about only working three days a week is that I get to try out more time intensive recipes. Today I made Pesto Pizzas, and even made the dough! I know. The best part is when M got home she said that she could smell the pizzas all the way outside. This is a big deal, because we always smell other people's cooking outside and it always smells amazing and makes us jealous--I like to think I made a few people jealous.

For the dough I used a recipe from Lauren's Latest. It doesn't take that long to make, and then you need to let it rise for about 2 hours. It yields enough for 2 pizzas.

Then I put pesto on (from a jar--I think it was Classico brand), spinach, mozzarella, red onion, and a sprinkle of shredded parmesan. Presto Pesto!

The last time I made pizza, it definitely wasn't round. I think I'm almost more proud at the roundness of the pizza than anything else.